Dear Clients, Colleagues, and Friends,
Happy Valentine’s Day! The day of love - and not just with a romantic partner.
Today is about giving attention to the power of love in our lives – for ourselves (the hardest for many), for our children, for our friends, for our partners, for our extended family, and for our community. You may not have a partner, or even children of your own, but you have so many opportunities to love and be loved in our world. And you need to start with you – self compassion is key in loving yourself.
The biggest gift we can give our children (and anyone!) is for them to feel seen, heard and loved for who they ARE, not what they’ve achieved. We need to be intentional about this message and when we are, the impact is palpable. They need to know explicitly that they matter.
Last year, I introduced this idea both in my own home and in my Thrive with a Guide community. Many of you shared your stories of the experience of doing it, the impact on your kids and even shared some photos. In my home, as testament to the way it made all three of my kids feel, their hearts are still up a full year later. When I asked why: “because it’s nice, it makes me feel good, everytime I see them I think about how sweet it was that you did that, it’s nice that other people notice things about me that I may not have noticed.” My heart is full.
If you are working at home today and have bandwidth, cut out some hearts (that part was an unexpected joy for me – hadn’t done that in years!) and write little notes of what you love about your child (their character, not achievements) and tape them to your child’s bedroom door before they get home from school.
If you are working out of the house today, brainstorm and make a list for each kid whilst at work and then secretly do the hearts when you get home and post them on their door before bed.
Or… hand write them a little love note today with all of these character strengths, ways that they are valued and add value and leave it at their bedside this evening.
Please share how it went!
Here are some photos for inspiration:
About the Author
Vanessa Elias is a mental health activist, certified parent coach, speaker, and writer featured on NPR, PBS, and in the WSJ. She is the founder of Thrive with a Guide, LLC and serves as a group facilitator for the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). Block Party USA is her passion project. Vanessa helps parents achieve healthier family relationships and lasting, meaningful connections.